TheCable

YouNow is created for the everyday individual who seeks to gain a deeper understanding of Self, harness gifting, talent and natural abilities in order to achieve their highest potential. These write-ups are designed to help you become more conscious and deliberate in your interactions and day-to-day living

“I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.”

― Oscar Wilde

Our past hold many stories. The thresholds from which we lose our cool when seemingly small situations cause us to ‘overreact’ can almost always be found when we reach deep into ourselves and search our history. To third parties, these small situations are akin to making a mountain out of a molehill, but to us, it is deeply seated somewhere only we know, can see, and find.

Emotions are a very powerful force, and are at the core of our expressions. When the singer is happy, he composes happy songs, when the dancer is in tandem with her emotions, she produces a work of art, when the boss is happy, the environment is very conducive and enhances productivity. When emotions are therefore unsettled, the reverse is always the case.

Consider this, the things that trigger us emotionally are always tied to what happened to us in the past. Why would a fully grown woman begin to fret unnecessarily when her daughter in college fails to pick her calls? Perhaps when this woman was a child, she practically raised herself and her siblings, because her parents were either physically or emotionally unavailable, so she gets triggered when someone she cares about isn’t available.

What about a married man who was mocked incessantly when he was in high school because his hairline receded rather quickly, and whenever his wife teases him about his new hair transplant, he totally flips the lid and might even ‘abuse’ her in anger?

These are triggers that reach far back to childhood and while some may not be that far or serious, it still remains fairly certain that in order to understand why we react in certain ways, we just might be compensating for the inadequacies we felt when those things were first brought to our notice. By compensating for these inadequacies we react in ways that can harm those dear to us.

The onus is on us to recognize that these deeply rooted emotions do not, in essence, define who we are.
Our emotions do not define who we are, we define our emotions.

You, determine what you feel.

Remember Freedom is Peace; Optimism is Nature; Action is always within reach. BE MORE!

If you found this article relatable, let me know what you think in the comments. Do you want to live more intentionally and develop your gifts/talents for maximum impact? Feel free to reach me via email: [email protected]. You can also connect with me via;
Instagram @identitycoach
Twitter @identitycoach1
Facebook @identitycoach1

I look forward to hearing from you.
Yetunde Bankole-Bernard is ‘The identity Coach™”
Certified as an Image Consultant, Human connection and Personality type practitioner and Work place psychologist.